This has been floating around for some days.
It is still not fully formed - and, as I would prefer it out and done,
here goes.

Recently, several people have been asking me about my past.

When someone asks: "What was your experience with...."
the experience I am getting when attempting to share is interesting.
When thinking of the past several experiences take place simultaneously.
Here is an attempt to explain.

First let me explain - as I go to write this, right now, I have no idea
what is going to come out. My mind does not have it clear or organised
enough to explain it even to myself. I have attempted to share before, but
it never felt clear.  So quite a bit of rambling may happen.

When I go to access what my mind tells me is the past I am aware of the
studies that show that the mind is notoriously inaccurate, and remembers
the past in the way that the mind wants to remember the past. Each person
remembers the same event in different ways - according to what is most
convenient for them.

When thinking of the past there is a feeling that the person being
remembered is not actually me. A familiarity, but not actually this person
who is attempting to remember him in the past. I do not feel intimately
identified with that person.  They do feel familiar, and it does seem that
the remembered event did take place, but I do not feel like that person.

(In fact, it now feels like that in each moment. That is another level.)

So I wonder, at what age does 'the average person' start identify with
their past self?  This is what I mean.

When you see a photograph of a small baby, who your parents tells you
was/is you, do you feel a personal connection? Do you feel that is 'you'?
Then when older - at what age do you feel as though the person in the
photograph is you? I do not mean accessing your mind to remember, I am
talking about an actual feeling of intimate connection at the level of
such intimacy that you and the person in the photograph are one?

I have never had that. Ever. It is as though what we call the past dies in
each moment. There is only now. This now. Now.
(And the future is yet to happen - maybe.)

To me, thoughts of the past and the future are entertainment - mind games.
Fun - and absolutely nothing to do with the moment. (Let's not get into this one -
even the moment has nothing to do with anything.)

Change of tempo.
If a question is asked of the past that is relevant to the present, then
it is part of the present, but if it is just idle chatter - then it is -
idle chatter.

(If the question about the past is genuine, sincere, then it is more
likely to be presented in the form of a statement.)

One questioner asked: "Isn't the present built on the past."
Unfortunately, for most people, yes.
And as the past is dead, their lives not very alive either.

Almost all true innovations are an unconnected leap.
Not modifications, but innovations - a bolt from....

At some time I came to realise that what 'they' have been saying is true -
there is no past and there is no future - there is only now.
What we call past and future are just... not an accurate way of saying
it... all happening (and not happening) at once - on different vibrational
levels of what we call reality. (And each has its own reality/unreality.)

In the late 70's I used to spend private time with an Indian Guru.
He said: "You are to be my successor. Everything will be yours."
With a smile, he followed this by saying: "When I leave my body - run."
Contradiction? Not if you see the present in multi realities.

And there is nowhere to run - for everywhere you go - there you are!
So best to take it easy - and enjoy this very moment - just as it is.

Which brings up another point.
Someone asked how they can enjoy the moment when they are unhappy.
Suggestion. If you are born blind, you can either spend your life
complaining about it - or explore the maximum potential of each moment -
within the circumstance in which you find yourself. That sort of thing.

Sending love...