I have read many descriptions of people ‘awakening.’
Most of them are very different from each other.
Some suffering great pain and hardships for long periods, like Krishna Murti, Banki, and many others, and some just popping open.
My guess is it has to do with resistance, the condition/readiness of the body — and, via the mind, the Will.
I would imagine if you think you have to have “a burning fire near the navel”
then you will have to. Because of the Will.
“If you learn more,”
Just a technical point:
The more you learn, and think you know the further you are away from awakening.
“and your learning becomes understanding...”
Again, in my experience one never understands. I used to think that could not be so, but when I read Loa Tzu, Socrates, and many others — they all say they do not know.
If you are looking to awaken then you are rejecting the moment, just as it is.
This is complaint — and not connecting with the fact that everything is for us — we are all getting exactly what we need in each moment. Gratitude.
In my experience a feeling of awakening is realized when the moment is accepted, unconditionally, just as it is. It can also be when you really, really give up — as many people have experienced in the Satori group.
Using the Will to attain, anything, usually has unpleasant consequences.
You can usually check this for yourself by looking back at your life.
“Easy is right.” Loa Tzu.
Most of the people who have awakened say that it happened despite their searching, and a the same time they needed to have it as their main priority in life. And some people seem to pop open anyway.
Am I awakened?
No idea. Don't know what being fully awakened is. There are
so many descriptions. Some gurus who say they are awakened say they feel
hurt, or even angry when a disciple leaves them. That does not sound very
enlightened to me -- or even intelligent. Then other people say you have to
be able to walk on water and that sort of thing. I am certainly not good at
that -- I even get seasick easily.
As long as I can remember my ambition has been not to be angry at anyone.
Enlightenment was not my goal but not being angry at people. I was so
grateful when that was realized. Wonderful.
I do have a good idea of what being awake is not. And I can see very clearly
when people are not awake to themselves, and the next layer for them to see.
And I can see what I have come through that is longer appropriate for me.
For a long time what seemed to be layers of awakening kept happening.
Each one seemed to open up another level of... something.
Then one time there was another... something. Can't even remember when.
It was gentle and un-dramatic. Ordinary. Suddenly it seemed as though I have
always known... something, without knowing what the something was/is.
Time standing still could be one description -- but again, not dramatic,
just very ordinary.
For a long time I kept thinking that there was another level. Still do
really. Loa Tzu, and all that bunch -- they were really enlightened -- yet
they said they said they did not know! I still do not know if my not knowing
is the same as their not knowing. And it not longer seems important to me --
whoever me is.
At some stage I seem to have realised that there are no levels. That one is
very hard to explain. We are all awake. Always have been. Just our presence,
our ideas of what it is is in the way. It is not special at all.
Just ordinary. And to me it is not longer an issue -- one way or the other.
In addition to the body/mind/emotions/habits/personality, there is something
else. Can't even say The Watcher. Doesn't seem to have a description -- that
I can find anyway.
There are still things that pop -- another way of describing something that
I could not describe before. Jesus used parables; the Naqshbandi Sufis,
designs and practical experiences, and so on.
Sharing still seems to be part of my... whatever we call living. And it is
fun allowing emptiness to be so that 'packages' come through, and then
unwrap themselves. I often get amused and delighted as they take place.
Most of the time I do not even know what the next word is that I am going to
type. Fun.
Am I awakened? No idea. Don't know what being fully awakened is. There are
so many descriptions. Some gurus who say they are awakened say they feel
hurt, or even angry when a disciple leaves them. That does not sound very
enlightened to me -- or even intelligent. Then other people say you have to
be able to walk on water and that sort of thing. I am certainly not good at
that -- I even get seasick easily.
As long as I can remember my ambition has been not to be angry at anyone.
Enlightenment was not my goal but not being angry at people. I was so
grateful when that was realised. Wonderful.
I do have a good idea of what being awake is not. And I can see very clearly
when people are not awake to themselves, and the next layer for them to see.
And I can see what I have come through that is longer appropriate for me.
For a long time what seemed to be layers of awakening kept happening.
Each one seemed to open up another level of... something.
Then one time there was another... something. Can't even remember when.
It was gentle and un-dramatic. Ordinary. Suddenly it seemed as though I have
always known... something, without knowing what the something was/is.
Time standing still could be one description -- but again, not dramatic,
just very ordinary.
For a long time I kept thinking that there was another level. Still do
really. Loa Tzu, and all that bunch -- they were really enlightened -- yet
they said they said they did not know! I still do not know if my not knowing
is the same as their not knowing. And it not longer seems important to me --
whoever me is.
At some stage I seem to have realized that there are no levels. That one is
very hard to explain. We are all awake. Always have been. Just our presence,
our ideas of what it is is in the way. It is not special at all.
Just ordinary. And to me it is not longer an issue -- one way or the other.
In addition to the body/mind/emotions/habits/personality, there is something
else. Can't even say The Watcher. Doesn't seem to have a description -- that
I can find anyway.
There are still things that pop -- another way of describing something that
I could not describe before. Jesus used parables; the Naqshbandi Sufis,
designs and practical experiences, and so on.
Sharing still seems to be part of my... whatever we call living. And it is
fun allowing emptiness to be so that 'packages' come through, and then
unwrap themselves. I often get amused and delighted as they take place.
Most of the time I do not even know what the next word is that I am going to
type. Fun.
I think there is a lot more to share on this subject -- but the packages
just stopped coming.
Sending lots of unknowing love...
PAUL LOWE on Awakening
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